Back Step

At 34, I see myself as a young mature person who can analyze things as they happened and put wisdom into my perspective understanding of any given situation.

Or so I thought.

One night, while I was busily washing the dishes, our 2 year-old playful son went inside the kitchen area as he searches for anything to play with. He caught a glance of a 10kg sack of rice beside me and tilted it forward. The successive events went fast ? the sack of rice fell and the grains were scattered on the floor, our son excitedly played with the grains scattering it more, I tried to stop him and he shouted at the top of his voice next to my ear and I lost it.

Wham! goes my right hand to his left hand and he started to cry.He was still shouting so I brought him into a corner but he would not stay put.Wham! goes my hand again to his buttocks twice. Now he was crying uncontrollably.

My wife, who was resting inside our room, heard the “commotion” and took our son inside the room to calm him down and talk to him. I gathered the rice grains and went back to my chore.

”What was that?”, I said to myself trying to figure out what just happened.

What I expected from my 2 year-old son was what I should have shown to him on that given situation - maturity.This incident has cleanly-cut exposed my immaturity.I was deeply sad realizing I failed my son at that instance.

A few more minutes and my son came out of the room. I overheard her mommy telling him to go to me and say sorry for what he did. Slowly he walked towards me and started to say, “Daddy…”

I did not give him time to finish his sentence.I hugged him and apologized myself for being an immature father a while ago.”I am so sorry, Zek. Please forgive Daddy”.

Between sighs and sobs he smiled wryly.

It took an innocent 2 year old to re-emphasize my weakness once again.Now I have a lot of work to do on my self-proclaimed maturity particularly in managing my temper.

Lord, please give me more patience to help me overcome my quick bad temper.